I wrote something yesterday that I think is the intro/beginning/something to a book. It was very raw, emotional, personal, and just a little (a lot) scary. It made my husband cry. What I wrote has to do with FEAR.
I think a lot of us deal with fear everyday. Fear is so rampant. Fear of failure, fear of money, fear of love, fear of success, fear of not being good enough, fear of being our true selves, fear of what others think, Fear.... Fear... Fear.
I have been crippled by this. I know how devastating and debilitating this can be.
But I also know how beautiful life can be once you name your fears (I personally call my fear The Devil because it helps me remember how evil fear is, and how badly I do not want it in my life).
I prayed and prayed and prayed for God to come take my fears away for a long time. He sent me a special message when he started sending me a word: LIGHT.
I wrote about this "sending of the Light" on LIGHTbeamers when I first started my blog (Read original post here if you want to read how that word CHASED me, and God beat me over the head with it). But even then, I didn't have the words to fully describe it and appreciate it. I feel those words coming now. Another gift from God.
I'm a few years in now on my personal journey to overcome these irrational, totally energy blocking fears and live my life more purposeful, intentional, and BIGGER.
Do I have it all figured out? Um, hell no!
But I do know that anytime spent in the darkness is scary.
Yet living into the bright light can be even scarier because it means being vulnerable and truthful. That's why so many of us choose to stay stuck in the ruts!! It's easier and safer there sometimes.
But that is no way to live, friends. If you stay there, what will your life look like 10 years from now? Where will you be? I'm in my mid-40's and I want these years to count for something! I want to do fun things, go to cool places, meet interesting people, experience amazing things!! I no longer choose to hide in my closet, crying because of my fears.
There are times you just have to say F#^* this-- I am going to do life my way!!!!!
And so, I am going to write a book and share with the world my darkest and brightest days. I'm going to write about Fear, and how the LIGHT can save you from it.
And I am committed to building a Community of LIGHTbeamers who want to shine alongside with me!! The dark world needs us to link arms and do this work together!